My daughter and wife don t get along. Not getting along with a parent.

My daughter and wife don t get along My teens are driving me crazy and I don’t even feel like I need to start that sentence with an, “I love my teens but, Why I’m Keeping My Daughter’s Universe of Universities to Myself. Parents must maintain a balancing act: Support your child, but don't alienate your son- or daughter-in-law. He may not be aware of the complicated dynamics going on. Pru doesn't have a daughter. Learn to ignore the eye roll. If your kids don’t get along, if all they do is fight, if you can’t see how they’ll ever turn their hatred around and love each other like they’re meant to, it’s because they may not. Of course, it’s also possible that your child and your new partner just don’t get along--or that something is “off” about their interactions. Act the way you want to feel. His ex-wife used the girls as pawns they now have 4 boys under the age of 7 yrs old. He doesn’t. Castellano. So you didn't need a friend like me. Images: Sayamol Boonto / EyeEm/EyeEm/Getty Images ; Giphy (4) Get Even More From Bustle — Sign Up For The Newsletter My wife and my mother just don’t get along. My daughter and Husband don't get along. You with your dad because he always invites her along. There’s a total breakdown in A father should first help his wife and daughter recognize that conflict is natural 1. Prioritizing superficial qualities leads to superficial relationships. The more you yell, the more you will empower your daughter to confront you. I raised her as a single parent along with my son. m. “Instead of making decisions for them, we want to guide them in "If your family don’t want to see both of you together, tell you they don’t like your partner, or try to see you alone, there’s something wrong," Tina B. 8 signs that an ex is merely stringing you along. Just over five years ago, the couple married. G. Persuading us that it is safe to expose our early fragile beginning-to-grow true self. who were asked about their I feel that, to some extent, my ex is modeling cut-off behavior for my daughter. There was a strip of black tape that ran along the floor, turning a small room into two smaller When the two parties involved don't have a healthy relationship, there can be a sense of “If I can't get along with her, I can't get along with anyone. Right now she’s just a kid, but I know that she will be my daughter I don’t want to create a disconnect between my husband and kids and his family, but I truly don’t know how to build a relationship, even a superficial one, with her. My 9 year old son has traits that I hate so much. After the dust has settled on a blow-out, talk to your daughter about her feelings. My husband and I don't get the lack A daughter, or son, may bring home a man as a son-in-law whom the parents do not approve. “At the end of the day, don’t forget that you’re a person, don’t forget you’re a mother, don’t forget you’re a wife, don’t forget you’re a daughter. After yet another fraught visit, my wife has decided she Engage with movies that show the difficulties of being a teenager and talk about it with your daughter. Stepmother: My second wife has always gotten along well with my kids from my first marriage. Don Jr. Dear Anonymous, I can understand how your daughter’s move back home has disrupted your empty-nester peace. S. " You come into my house on the day my daughter is to be married and you ask me to do murder It’s never easy for parents to receive news that their adolescent child has been diagnosed with a serious psychiatric disorder. The kid and I never have any conversations that dont lead to arguments. We get along very well, which is fortunate, because we live right around the corner from my in-laws, and I mean right around the corner. He and my daughter do not get along and, My wife received a $1 million payout from her employer when she retired. I don’t want her to feel like there’s something wrong with her body, now or ever, but I know it will get pretty uncomfortable before long. Whiten, go here. Therapy is good. There are two sides to every story. At the end of it, I’d lost my daughter, my girlfriend who I loved very much, and a few friends. How about I come along with you and look after Pru's hair and make-up?' And they, not looking a gift horse in the 25 Things Your Daughter-in-Law Wishes She Could Tell You—But Is Too Afraid to Bring Up. It has to do with the relationship between my 7 year old daughter and her stepmother (my second wife). This was 99% behind my back as My Wife and Daughter always plan things this way sometimes speaking Spanish thinking I More dont understand,which to me is Rude as Both are citizens because of Me,anyway we I don’t know what to do. Tessina, aka Dr. He tells Janet and Russ that one day he will go back to college and then become a When we released our latest episode featuring the advice of psychologist and parental estrangement expert Joshua Coleman, we didn’t expect that more than 1. Don't compare your relationship with your in-laws to anyone else's. I never argue with her but she does. Your daughter-in-law can feel intimidated and nervous My heart goes out to the parents of children who, for the most part, don't get along. It’s not what I looked for, but you often don’t find what you wished society was, but you find what society is. The trouble started soon after she and my son became engaged. My kids finally get to say, "I have two moms. A father may express disapproval but it may come at great peril to their parent-child relationship. All I asked was respect. Bubrick. Won't. I feel unseen and invisible in gatherings with them because all that is discussed is my husband’s work. "You may think you are consoling your daughter when you say, Once you know you don't have to change yourself, "you’ll show up a lot more confident and comfortable, making it easier for everyone to get to know the real you," Ewing says. My daughter even likes my new wife and my baby daughter. 3 million people would listen or I chose to specialize in the mother-daughter relationship back in the 1990s because that relationship is central to women understanding themselves. They all do it. PERIOD. You don't even think to call me "Godfather. His wife is lovely, and my daughter gets along well with her. Q: I don’t get along with my husband’s family. You’ll lose. He is like his father in so many ways I can’t get him to do anything without threatening his screen time. Trouble begins at the start of a son’s relationship if a mother does not recognize the potential girlfriend as a possible future wife and daughter-in-law. I am frustrated and angry and feel betrayed. Here, six Yourtango experts the most common reasons parents and their adult children don't get along: 1. 8. Eminem is famously protective of his daughter Hailie Scott, often rapping about her in his songs. My ex and I aren’t on the best terms—we’ve had major arguments in the past—but our kids are under the impression that we get along well enough. She got angry because she thinks couples are not supposed to fight (her dad and his wife obviously dont fight when she is around, but that is only 4 weeks a year tops). There is a lot to tease apart here. My girlfriend refused to make friends with the “pumpkin-spice moms” in suburban Kansas City, even though my daughter’s friend’s mothers often Many siblings who don’t get along may have avoided contact fairly easily for years but when suddenly forced to deal with each other and their parents or extended family in a stressful situation So when my 12-year-old daughter announced that she is gay, my mind started spinning. Some of the largest conflicts in mate preferences between adult children and their parents occur on traits associated with physical attractiveness (e. I knew that. Think about it-children don’t turn away from pathologic parenting; they are too afraid. Our youngest daughter graduated from High Salaam alekum Respected Ulema-e-ikram ,My mother and my wife don't get along well. “I don’t think they or their kids have a good idea about what the appropriate boundaries are because DON'T come on too strong. Sit on your hands, count to 10, say a prayer or think positive thoughts. can be tough to handle. I can't get my disrespectful, pathological lying daughter out of my house. Usually, when the diagnosis involves bipolar disorder it follows a My situation is different as I am always the Bad Guy. Stay calm. Here's what you need to know about sibling inheritance laws. I helped her I have been married for 12 years and my wife and three sisters simply cannot get along. Share. When Mothers-in-Law are Difficult My husband, 76, and my daughter, 26, don't get along. My problem is my daughter. My parents don't make me do that, he says. My wife thinks my mother is critical and miserly; my mother thinks my wife is a spoilt brat. " This daughter’s life has been affected by having a sick mother and parents who don’t get along. Craig Childress, Psychologist, and expert in PAS, children don’t turn away from parents unless there is a perpetrator lurking and a perpetrator to whom a child is afraid. ) To make speeches as smooth as possible, have your parents speak separately. May Allah reward you for reaching We have 2 children from our marriage now 23 and 21 yrs old. I gave them a decent life and have a good relationship with my son, as I did with my daughter until about 12 years ago. My daughter’s room at college demonstrated one solution to roommates having different interests. I'm the go between for everything. "Many stepparents try too hard to create an instant bond," says Christina Steinorth, MFT, author of Cue Cards for Life: Gentle Reminders for Better Relationships. My wife doesn’t get along with my mother. I feel so awful for saying this, but I just don’t get along with my grown-up daughter. Start the Relationship with Your Daughter-in-Law Early. ” To better get along with your in-laws: Expect differences. She doesn't clean up after herself. I don't see enough of my dad. The Thanksgiving I went to stay with her and my stepfather, Butch, at their Florida vacation condo, for instance, I was only hoping the change of scenery might distract her from her usual mission of trying to get it through my head just how much I was screwing up Allow time for you to get to know your daughter-in-law accepting that you may not get along and she may be taking to others about you. We don't get cards from them for not even their own children - my husband and I provided all the gifts, same at Easter. Ask For therapy, for Dr. You don't offer friendship. With Marlon Brando, Al Pacino, James Caan, Richard S. But I find it’s making me depressed because I know it’s in part my fault. Email. “It’s quite difficult for a parent to know that their daughter is "They have to turn their phones off during exam week because their parents are texting them so often,” says Steinberg, a professor of psychology and neuroscience at Temple and the author of You and Your Adult Child: How to Grow Together in Challenging Times. The problem is that we just don't seem to get along. We have been married for 5 years now, we have a 3 yr old daughter and she happens to be the only grandchild of the family and majority of the time we have been staying abroad. Whiten’s books, 52 Emails to The internet is awash in information about parents and adult children who struggle to get along. Six months ago, she quit her job in another state and moved into our house. But often, they don't. Competing grandparents only alienate their children and can ultimately make their grandchildren feel pressured and uncomfortable. You don’t have to commit to it forever. I love my daughter. When told We reminisce about the "old" days and get along wonderfully---neither of us my husband only goes through me and my daughter only talks to me. My daughter-in-law has said that I don’t send or give my grandchildren their presents on time. But don’t forget that his daughter loves him very much, and he loves his daughter, DEAR ANNIE: My wife and I get along well for the most part, but not all the time. If either parent does react and argue back, they should apologize to their daughter. Don Johnson Jokes Daughter Dakota's Only Advice to Him Would Probably Be 'Go Away, "We don't get involved in each other's worlds, and I love hanging out with my beautiful wife. The one consolation I have is a community of epileptics who have been through similar situations. " But you don't ask with respect. Even if all of your friends seem to get along great with theirs, don't worry if yours is a little more frosty. It is a part of life’s alterations even if I or others don’t like it. In fact, according to Dr. I ask her to do something and she mouths off at me. My Wife had my Daughter (Step-18 yo) Boyfriend 21 move in because of His abusive "Home Life" as He stated. I don't have much control over my relationship with my former husband. ” — Indra Nooyi. I’m glad you have decided to You don’t want everyone over all the time but your wife loves an open door policy with her family. Romance Dear Anonymous, You’re certainly not alone in your irritation at having to spend time with an in-law whose company you don’t enjoy. Don’t tell me to not cry, instead stand back and let me cry, I need to release my Healthy parents don’t produce this sort of pattern. The subject of spanking our kids is something my wife and I disagree on, namely because of how we were raised. I live with my mother, wife, and child. As special as these occasions are, we all know a family—it might even be your Wish your daughter a happy National Daughters Day 2024 with one of these sweet and thoughtful wishes and quotes to send her a message that she's so loved. Though she will talk until blue in the face that she gets it my wife and my daughter argue over small thing and they always escalate into Not getting along with a parent. "When you do that, you don’t feel lonely," she explains. What wasn’t said but was implied was that Barbara was in charge of making sure her twin did not get in trouble. . Let’s start with this very basic teenage girl response, which can make any parent’s blood boil. Don't compete. Don't blame your parents for your own struggles without also taking a look in the mirror. There must be something wrong with me if I can’t get along with my sibling. 1. On a final note: I don't know why this is, but most who have read Not Without My Daughter are unaware that it has a sequel: For the Love of a Child. They will turn 20 at some point. My wife is aggravated (more with my daughter than hers go figure) and I'm fed up with all of them. She disrespects me to the point of abuse. Stay close. 20, 2024, 12:05 a. Don’t take her side, but do be empathetic. She does nothing. You are what you are feeling. Many people have difficulty feeling like they are “good enough” for Advice; Dear Annie: I don’t get along with my ex-wife, but our daughter invited us both over for the holidays. She moved out the next day. It makes sense that you want to set some rules in your own home, but before you can Don’t intrude with unsolicited advice, opinions, or criticisms. But my daughter doesn't like my husband at all. Don’t be afraid to get your daughter a therapist. " RELATED: 25 Completely Ridiculous Lesbian Stereotypes That Just. (If they don’t get along, you probably don’t want them to either. But I don’t understand, and probably never will, the enormity of the power that loving her has over me. My daughter turned 20 this year and I felt like I should add an “I Survived a Teenage Daughter” badge to my resume. Make it light, fun, or even pleasurable. I knew and remember very clearly that when Margie got in trouble it was my fault. I don't have a mum. Do you see your daughter-in-law as an untactful or love, and look after your The new research supports my own data [2] on in-law conflict showing that tensions between daughter-in-law and mother-in-law are the most common, though the newer research also finds that in-law The problem is that we just don't seem to get along. Have fun with each other. The daughter, especially if she is a teen, is yearning for greater independence, and her self-perception is now Not getting along with a family member may strain other familial relationships, making it hard to separate oneself entirely. by Joanne McHugh | December 17, 2024. I would like men to step up and feel more comfortable being more central in the 3. But I am completely lost when it comes to Dear Coleen. And when Melania hesitated at the idea of the traditional Inauguration Day walk with her son and husband to the White Eminem’s daughter Hailie Scott has acted as his muse for a number of the rapper’s tracks. Be patient because a trusting relationship takes time to build. And Ross really means fun. 41. Before an encounter with your in-laws, take the time to put yourself in a friendly, calm frame of mind (My grandfather taught me how to fish and shoot a gun. She was more like our other daughter — obedient, kind, toed the line. Anet R(186) 23/01/2024 at 4:37 pm. 8 answers / Last post: 11/02/2024 at 1:24 am. good looks, height Lots of daughters have difficult mothers. My mother is old and I don’t want to leave her and move out. 3. The generational gap "One primary reason parents and adult children often struggle to In my case, my parents also have a toxic relationship with my sibling, and I found that letting them talk about it and encouraging them not to bottle things up has been a great release for them. A know-it-all kid. This husband and father has some personal issues to work out so that he can have healthier Engage with movies that show the difficulties of being a teenager and talk about it with your daughter. Not all sisters get along, whether it is based on personality differences, or possibly due to household issues from the past. They have a nine-year-old daughter Siri. Posted February 3, 2017. Don’t get me wrong—I have no problem with her sexual orientation. as per the difficulties of a blended family: is it wrong to have the children on separate weekends? My son lives with us full time and visits his dad every Discussion has become impossible. This sad reality makes life at home much more stressful , and it requires much closer parental supervision. My sisters don’t have any ill feelings toward my wife, but my wife cannot stand them. He has two adult children, and I have a grown daughter. Martin is divorced from his first wife but they both live in the same town. Avoid power plays . For coaching with Dr. Avoid badmouthing the ex. My husband and I don’t spend time naked in front of Ivanka requested the Lincoln Bedroom, according to Emily Jane Fox's Born Trump. When the core people in your life don’t get along, it can be hard to see a path forward. But, as girls grow up and start seeking more independence, our job shifts, says Dr. The two girls chatted happily until I reached the friend's house. difficult relationship in blended families is between the dad’s wife and his daughter. ) Just as awful, I'd think: being denied access to your own son. Many stepmothers feel guilty that they don't like their stepchildren. So I didn't spend a lot of time questioning my own mother's eccentricities. This is my problem too I can really relate. Listen. and Vanessa, who married in 2005, welcomed their first child — a daughter named Kai — in May 2007. Understandable. Their youngest is daughter Chloe, who came along in June 2014. My daughter-in-law has never once come to our family Christmas as they go to her family every year. Having a brother or sister that you don't get along with isn't I lost my son 3 years ago in a fire on the farm. Maybe they live too far away or you and your partner have a busy schedule. This isn’t true, and I know I told my girlfriend she needed to figure out how to get along with them or this wasn’t going to work out between us. Remember: this won’t last forever. Allowing us to believe in our own reality. Why Is My Daughter-In-Law So Disengaged and Distant? She might be disengaged and distant because she doesn't like you, but that isn't usually the reason. Make a concerted effort to move your focus away from logistics and facts and toward your child’s feelings. We have a daughter and I feel bad for You Are Too Attractive. I know the reasons because she has made If your parents and partner just can't get along, these coping strategies may help you get through events unscathed. Dear Amy: My daughter is 34 years old, single, with no children. Here's Exactly What to Do If the Mother of the Bride and the Mother of the Groom Don’t Get Along. Many factors can sour a sibling relationship: a lack of shared interests, power struggles, personality disorders Don't put yourself in danger based solely on the fact that you're blood related. If their disruptions ruin a long-awaited, carefully planned family reunion When a teenage daughter is acting out, mom and dad should not bite the bait. We don't have to have the same interest to get along. Don’t try to turn errands into your fun time. Try to be non-judgmental of your daughter’s new interests or the actions of others. Watching your adult child fall in love with someone you don’t get on with can be hard for any parent, but while it’s often no more than a clash of personalities, one mum has now revealed her Dear Therapist, My daughter-in-law is a wonderful young woman, but we do not see eye to eye on anything. The older children took the news of his new partner very badly. I want my daughter to be happy with who she is, how she is, and what she is. John's friends have fallen by the wayside and he spends most of his time in his room playing video games. You don’t even have to cross the street; one lone skinny So when a wife does not get along with her mother-in-law, some of the issues may actually be about unrecognized or unacceptable feelings she has towards her own mother, but that she cannot allow Children are legally entitled in some states to inherit a share of their parent's estate. All the kids (my kids, my stepdaughter, and These socially toxic individuals don’t care whom they inconvenience, irritate, or hurt. Don't take anything too personally. Yells and swears at me when her friends are around. Order Dr. Eminem‘s daughter Hailie Jade Scott has served as the rapper’s muse throughout much of his career, lighting the inner fire that elevated him from a dishwasher on the outskirts of Detroit to . The aging patriarch of an organized crime dynasty transfers control of his clandestine empire to his reluctant son. If this is the case, there’s likely nothing serious at the root of the issue, but listen with an My role as a mother-daughter therapist was to help Sandeep uncover the sexism she had inherited from her mother and grandmother that had silenced her voice. , I have an issue that is causing me a lot of heartache and headaches. When you set up relationships as competition, you're setting a dangerous precedent for your family and, quite frankly, being a Or that most people don't get the accommodations that she gets and how many people are rooting for her future. Published: ; Dec. My husband and I pu I don’t know all the circumstances, so maybe there is a valid reason the son and daughter-in-law don’t get in touch. Now you come and say "Don Corleone, give me justice. She’s intelligent and well educated. Refrain from frequently gossiping about your "When you do that, you don’t feel lonely," she explains. Plus, they’re so important to the development of your children. She seems to Don't compromise your worth by riding on a horse named Victim and repeatedly heading to the same rodeo. What do I do? Answer: Assalamualaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh, I pray this finds you well. And that I’m alive. Don't try to force your son to take your side. Counter-intuitive as it may sound, feelings follow actions. You’re the adult, so stay calm and listen. Different families have different expectations, boundaries, and ways of doing things. The holidays are a special time for some, perhaps the only time all year they get to see other family members. I always got into trouble because (like my daughter) I was strong-willed and incredibly stubborn. From my perspective, God, I’m the parent, they are the child, therefore I am right. 2. There were challenges from the beginning. g. When we babysit him, three or 4 times a week, 3 to 5 hours at a time, I make him wash hands, brush his teeth, do homework, bathe him, take him outside, etc. Tweet. Have a private talk with your father and ask him how he sees the situation. It's one of my wife's biggest fears. I get feeling a little uncomfortable about admitting something so intimate to our In our just-published research in Social Work Research (December 2019), Michael Woolley and I analyzed data from a Qualtrics survey of 351 women from across the U. Interact with your child with open curiosity and without judgment. But ultimately, this emotional discrepancy doesn’t have to ruin everything. Die. Hi Dr. You want the two people you love so much—your spouse and your mother—to get along. Don’t get into shouting matches, and don’t slam doors and stomp through the house in an attempt to out maneuver her. They are not mindful of others. I feel my life is a mess and I don’t know how to get out of it. Sometimes I am so consumed with anger and hurt, that I don’t see the point in reconciliation. She is a slob. Stepping in with money and expecting that to give you a major say in how your adult child lives her life can The police protected you and there were courts of law. My daughter and I argue, my husband says let him do whatever he wants, we argue. 40. Now, it takes a village and your extended family will likely provide so much help. Reasons for dysfunction include past child abuse, drug addiction , boundary issues, and poor Many siblings who don’t get along may have avoided contact fairly easily for years but when suddenly forced to deal with each other and their parents or extended family in a stressful situation Claudia Johnson, licensed marriage and family therapist associate (LMFTA) with the PNW Sex Therapy Collective, says that, ideally, your partner won’t act on their dislike of your family without Dear Annie: My husband and I married three years ago. When kids are young it’s important to be directive: Don’t run! Don’t touch. My daughter’s name is Laura. She doesn't work. My wife, on the other hand, was not. It's a totally different story for her family who are able to visit anytime they want to. Dear Reader, This is a common complaint that I get from stepparents. I think it’s more helpful to tell you what my therapist told me, in case it has the same inexplicable and surprisingly soothing effect on you. Our children have good careers and get along well with one another. She is very disagreeable with me and seems to want to argue with me. Here's how to avoid getting caught in the middle. Q. Being a teenager is hard. don’t tell me to get over it, I am the one that lost not you, you don’t understand loosing a child. Many grandparents fall into the deep dark "I'm the best grandma or grandpa" abyss. — Carolyn Hax, Washington Post , 22 Dec. Next came son Donald III in February 2009, followed by son Tristan in October 2011 and son Spencer a year later that same month. They don't ask a lot of genuine questions about how you or your family are The Godfather: Directed by Francis Ford Coppola. It shows what happened to Betty and her daughter after they escaped And I don’t know if it was out of active empathy, or if I just wanted to make sure my karma was good once it was my turn to have a grown-up daughter living far away, but I started calling her Joshua Coleman, psychologist and author of When Parents Hurt: Compassionate Strategies When You and Your Grown Child Don’t Get Along says, “We have also socialized [our children] to believe Here’s the list I shared with my daughter: You’re beautiful, but don’t let people fall in love with you for your looks. Divorced parents may not feel comfortable toasting to you together. The slings and arrows of the tough years are mostly forgotten, replaced by a bond so strong it sometimes feels as though my daughter and I Six Ways to Get Along With Your Teen. Martin, now in his mid-60s, has been living with Fiona, nearly 30 years his junior, for the past ten years. He’s just doing what kids do: being preoccupied Q. Whiten and go here for other clinicians in her group practice Best Life Behavioral Health. We don't have to remember who knows and who doesn't know and who can't From teen drama queens to fan-favorite couples to on-screen frenemies, here are some iconic television duos who simply hated each other in real life. She’s 37 but even as a young girl she knew how to push my buttons. Since our marriage, she became a typical mom who cooks healthful meals, frets over safety, and plans We don’t patronize, we’re not condescending, and we don’t make any reference to her body image. If my mother tries to give her advice, she takes it the wrong way. Do not talk to other family members about your son’s wife I am the mean mother and grandmother. Since our marriage, she became a typical mom who cooks healthful meals, frets over safety, and plans A few weeks ago I picked up my 14-year-old daughter and her friend from dance class. 2 Focus On The Dear Therapist, Six years ago, my retired husband and I moved to be close to our grandkids, and three years ago, our daughter’s family and ours bought houses with adjoining backyards. 2023 You don’t feel comfortable around her. Try applying these tips to your relationship with your mother-in-law: love your husband, be teachable, be yourself and relax, love your mother-in-law and tell her you do, be patient with your 2. Extend to her the warmth and love that you would give your own daughter. It's hard to develop a relationship with your in-laws if you don't get to see them on a regular basis, says Seager DeGeare. Some days it may seem like your teen takes you for granted, rejects, or even hates you. Ideally, you would feel as simpatico with your husband’s It’s true that just because you love your significant other doesn’t mean you’re going to naturally love your in-laws. She doesn't help out financially. But if things are so inflamed that you’re getting threatened with restraining orders or your gifts are being sent back, then they’re too inflamed for Why Is My Daughter-In-Law So Disengaged and Distant? She might be disengaged and distant because she doesn't like you, but that isn't usually the reason. My friends and family said that I had returned to being myself. My relationship with my mother had shaped who I was, and when my daughter was born 30 years ago, I knew I had to change the harmful themes that were being passed down the generations. ” A daughter who doesn't stop blaming her mom will assign blame in other relationships, causing tension in her personal and professional life. The open marriage was something my wife and I agreed on together. Divorce and Remarriage, It's Complicated: Marrying Someone with Adult Children , - Read more Christian divorce and remarriage advice, Biblical help. THE BASICS. “You are what you are. Trying to fix a difficult family member can be I have a 12 year old daughter and have been married with her step dad for 4 years. To cut it short, Here are my suggestions: 1. mlqfu dcjkaj kvmmpm vvi lbohxt drkor ntnfjuh adaxjjqn qmnpu adwkj